So, I’ve had a shower for the first time since Sunday. Is that gross? Sure. Did I smell? Absolutely. Does knowing that change anything? No, depression doesn’t care, and you pretty much just feel worse cause you know you’re being gross.
I brushed my teeth, put some undies and a face mask on (my skin was so dry it was cracking).
Now I’m sitting in my towel, propped on the bed by all the pillows, with the fan facing me head on.
Showers used to be so relaxing and rejuvenating for me, and whilst they still make me feel better they can actually be really hard work. Chronic pain and fatigue wipes me out and after a shower these days I have to do the prop up and fan routine because the post shower combo is exhaustion plus hot flush.
What I’ve done differently tonight though to improve my mental health is put the Love Never Dies soundtrack on 🎭
Feeling like I’m matching my masked up love ‘The Phantom’, though it is very hard not being able to sing along with this on 💜
Hope you enjoyed my update, basically I’m saying it’s ok to be gross sometimes. Both your mental and physical health are important so if you can only just manage to get out of bed some days, be proud you got out’ve bed!